Self help, coaches and finding one's course

As a member of eWomenNetwork, an international women's organization, I have the opportunity to receive two free coaching sessions from a list of pre-selected coaches. For two years I've debated whether or not to utilize this benefit.

My excuse is also probably my ignorance for this profession. But I always believed a coach was akin to a psychiatrist and I wasn't getting comfy on one of those couches. Besides, I always felt I could self correct without outside influences.

But I know some of the most successful women have personal coaches for various aspects of their lives. Perhaps I was wrong.

SO I finally decided to give it a try. Well, that is I made the connection with the coach. Now I have to make the appointment. I'm a little unsure of what to do. You see she asked me to tell her a little bit about myself what area I would like to concentrate on in the session: personal or professional.

When I started to respond I was like a "push me-pull you" character...every time I wrote about my personal goals I got pulled into business goals. They are not exclusive of each other.

Here's what I mean...

I’m 47 and never been married---my choice. Two years ago I entered a relationship with a great guy, but he has three children and I never wanted kids. He lived an hour away and it became increasingly difficult to travel back and forth and since he had custody of the boys, we decided I would give it a shot and move in with him and work from home. The kids love me, so there’s no issue there.

What I found after a year was that I had changed. Without my circle of influence that gave me a sense of pride and self worth, I was losing ground to the fuzzy bunny slippers/sweat suit work style and slower pace life. I knew going in that I was going to give up things to make this work, but what I realized recently is that when you give up core values and needs, everything suffers. I was spiraling downward and my relationship and my business suffered.

I gave up my home
I gave up my close proximity to my circle of influence
I gave up my music (I was a regular fan on the local blues circuit—check out http://www.marilynsmusicscene.com/ ) because what was once an hour drive to see the bands is now 2hrs.
I gave up my sense of self

But that's where the self-correcting factor kicks in. I must have unconsciously recognized that I needed to make a change because I began to resurface in the networking world. I traded my sweat suit for a dress suit (sadly a few sizes larger than I'd like) and took on the challenge of building a new chapter of eWomenNetwork in South Jersey.

But I couldn't do it alone. Thankfully, Milt and I can talk about anything. In a tear-jerker session the other day he vowed to support my "rebirth" because what is important to me is as important to him. And he means it. Like a said earlier, great guy.

So when I stayed back in Cherry Hill the other night to catch the Randy Lippincott Band at Red, Hot & Blue and then drove up to the Mermaid in Chestnut Hill later that night to see Zydeco-a-go-go, he was totally supportive. John Colgan-Davis from the Dukes of Destiny, who was at the Mermaid summed it up when he said, "the music world is all right again...Marilyn is back."

And I think I'll send the coach a link to this blog so she can decide where should I begin....

Networking--

Every once in a while you are given a chance to start something meaningful from the ground up. If you are lucky there is a blueprint to follow, but the final result is determined by the building blocks you can lend to the foundation.

So it is with the new eWomenNetwork chapter in South Jersey. After a few years of attending events on the PA side of the bridge, I lobbied the founders of the organization to start a chapter in New Jersey.

In most states, chapters can be found in major towns and cities, but my vision expanded beyond townships and counties--I wanted to bring this organization to all women in South Jersey and I now have that opportunity as the new Managing Director of eWomenNetwork SJ.

I am blessed that I have a core group of women standing right by my side as we launch the new chapter. Some are women that, like me have be attending the Philly events, others are women that I've known and admired through my own business network and others are friends of these women.

Together we are poised to create the largest, most resourceful organization for women in business in SJ.

"It takes teamwork to make the dream work." (I wish I could claim that as mine...but kudos to rightful owner of that quote.)

In many ways eWomenNetwork is about business—we want to connect women with other women opening doors for them to do business with each other. But we are much more. At eWomenNetwork our philosophy is that you must first and foremost give to others "first." We believe that by giving and being "other-focused" you create a world of abundance for all. For us, networking is really the art of "giving" and searching for ways to serve the needs of others before focusing on ourselves.

eWomenNetwork is comprised of various levels of women in business…from entrepreneurs with one–two employees to representatives from larger companies. Our goal is to offer the best resource for women to do business with other women. We offer members a website on which they can post their photo and business profile for the 200,000 women who visit the site every day; we celebrate women authors by providing them a publishing company dedicated to their success; we have our own radio program; we offer free mentoring and coaching sessions to the members; we support other women through the eWomenNetwork Foundation; and we strive to provide access for our members to women in senior levels of the business world.

http://www.ewomennetwork.com/
http://www.ewomennetwork.com/vision.html
www.ewomennetworkfoundation.org/index.html

I hope you will read this and "get it". If you do, I'm sure I'll see you at an upcoming event. Just visit the website listed above and click on events. Scroll down to SJ and make your reservation! And remember to share this with other women you admire.